Thursday, October 05, 2006

let me define shit

Yes, That's it. My PA (General Paper a.k.a Pengajian Am) Paper 2 is done. I know most of you all are clueless to this dumb subject so allow me to explain why it's like SHIT.

General Paper is actually a combination of a few subject elements. This include Modern Maths (quite simple becuz most of us do add m3 b4), Geography, General Knowledge, History, Bahasa Malaysia and ultimately Kindergarden Colouring. Why Kindergarden Colouring? Simple. Because we have to plot bar graphs, and after that, we have to present it nicely, and we will have to colour every single bar. That part sucks alright. We will have very little time to colour, and often, we end up colouring even WORSE than Kindergarden Kids. I have proof if u all wanna see.

So, there are 2 papers.
Paper One (60 Objective Questions) 2 Hours to complete.
The objective questions are based as follows.
15 General Knowledge Questions. This SUCK BIG TIME. Because it can vary from the hell to heaven OK? They can be so random until they can ask... like, Why the fuck did Malaysia debated with Singapore for the Pulau Batu Puteh? That's how random it is.

30 History Related questions. Ahh..this part is much better, because there is a set sylabbus to study. Just read up the notes, and u should not have any problems with it. Furthermore, it's all Malaysian History, urmm..Sistem Pentadbiran and Kehakiman Malaysia etc...... Which i admit, is my favourite part of history. Don't give me that look ok? Why i like it, because it is shit easy mah. Simple.

15 Oh-I-Think-You-Are-Damn-Stupid-If-You-Cannot-Answer Questions.
This should be easy shit for science and maths students. Let me give you a sample question. Here goes....If a person take a 1 year loan of RM 10,000 with an interest rate of 2.1%, how much does he need to pay every month. Don't believe your eyes...? Yes, it is that damn easy.

That's all for paper one. Overall it's OK-Lah. You Must be thinking, if paper one is ok, why am i bitching so much. Simple. That's because i have not revealed paper 2.

Paper 2- The Paper where the shit, stress and gory begins.
5 Sections, A,B,C,D,E. 3 hours to complete (actually, 3 hours is not really enough, because there are hell alot of stuff to answer)

In section A, you will have to write an essay. Two questions, choose one. In section A, the topic given for the essay is arts related. For example, they will ask you gejala sosial problems, business related topics and law. You will have no choice, but to crap out an essay.

Hey, they are still not done with the essays alright. In Section B, you will have to write ANOTHER ESSAY this time covering science related topics. This means the question might vary from health and medicine, DNA, and practically whatever is related to the science field.

Wait, they are still not done torturing you. In section C, there will be 4 General Articles ( 2 Science Articles and 2 Arts Articles). You will have to choose 2 Articles and answer 2 questions that come with the article. Your answer length should hit about 50 words per response. In total, you will have to answer 4 questions, and it is not easy. The information that you need WILL NOT BE GIVEN in the article, the article is just to start the topic off. All answers must come FROM THE BRAIN.

In section D, you will have to use your colouring skills. They will provide an article, with percentage values from year to year, and you must convert it into a graph. Here, you will require simple calculation, but how simple it is, "When something can go wrong , IT WILL GO WRONG ". This takes time, to slowly plot out and actually define the article. One small slip up, i.e as in you choose the wrong graph to present your work, and you will lose ALL POSSIBLE MARKS FOR YOUR GRAPH. That is why there is alot of pressure when you are plotting this graph. Hellish as it may sound, it is a compulsory question that all candidates will have to answer.

Finally, in section E, which is yes the last part of hell you might say, is also not simple. The crappiest part, that is because you will have to do an ULASAN JADUAL. Fucking stupid ok. The bloody ulasan, may take up to about 250+ words if you are a heavy writer. To ulas the jadual, you will have to make some calculations first, as in the overall percentage, the overall average and give comments on the rising and declining values. When we reach this section, usually there is NO TIME LEFT, our hand are SWEATY AND WE CANNOT PRESS THE CALCULATOR BUTTONS PROPERLY, and our BRAIN IS USUALLY OVERHEATED. The result, we churn out shitrolls for the teacher to mark =) .

The total marks for paper 2 is 100. Section A (25), Section B (25) Section C (10+10) Section D (15) and lastly section E (15). That comes up to the GRAND TOTAL OF 100.

People always ask me, what happens when you mix shit piles together. The answer, GENERAL PAPER !!!

Here's something for you all to laugh on.

Food's On Us - video powered by Metacafe

He has the potential to be the blowjob king man!!!


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